Pockets Full Of Ashes
by Shimegami
Summary: *Seventh Chaper Uploaded* Wow! Look, an update! It's been months since my last one. Second to last chappie, folks! Revel in the short story, yet long new chapter!
1. Prologue

Pockets Full Of Ashes  
By Shimegami  
Warnings: Dark, Angst, Yaoi(All the good stuff)  
Disclaimer: Not mine. Don't sue.  
AN: An old children's rhyme and his forgotten past come back to haunt Watari. We all fall down...I swear, nobody writes about the poor guy.  
Does he even have a past? Or is he just the genki scientist in the background whose potions never work? Well, if he does, consider this AU.  
It's Watari, my way! XD  
  
Recommended Listening Music:  
Hmmm...the only one is Shivering, a very good Weiss background song.  
  
Pockets Full Of Ashes: Prologue  
  
/Ring around the rosie.../  
  
No! Stop! Don't sing that anymore!  
  
/Pockets full of posies.../  
  
Yamero!! Not that song anything but that song!  
  
/Ashes, ashes.../  
  
Please...not that...onegai...  
  
/We all fall down.../  
  
Don't make me remember...  
  
/Ring around the rosie.../  
  
Onegai...  
  
/Pockets full of posies.../  
  
Stop it..  
  
/Ashes, ashes.../  
  
I'll fall down again...  
  
/We all fall down.../  
  
Watari jerked out of his sleep, gasping for breath. Cold sweat dripped off his face, dotting the already damp sheets. The air conditioning  
humed loudly, a constant buzz in the back of his head. Shadows played across the walls and across the whiteness of his bed. Slowly he  
relaxed as no threat presented itself. The air conditioner drummed on.  
  
"A dream..."  
  
Watari started at his voice, filling the oppressive silence. The only response was a sleepy flutter from 003. Exasperated with himself, he  
flopped back onto the bed.  
  
"Losing your mind, Watari. Too many lab fumes, that what it is." His voice was strained, his smile hurt his face.  
  
Rolling onto his side, Watari prepared to go back to sleep, when a small snippet fluttered through his consciousness, too brief to be truly  
heard in the mind, a ephmearal fluff of vibrations that rode to air on invisible wings.  
  
"We all fall down..."  
  
Watari curled up in his sheets. It was too cold.  
  
The air conditioner hummed on.  
  
~TBC~  
  
AN:...Okie, I'm starting to freak myself out. Really. Soo, reviews? Flames? Chocolate-covered bishie? 


	2. Chapter One

AN: Woo! The first chapter! XD!! I really like this fic in my mind, and since receiving fast encouragement (Three reviews in one night...  
I think that's a new record for me.) I am continuing on it now. (My other fics are on standby, as once again inspiration has not yet bit  
my ass yet. -_-;;) Anyhoo, the daily life of Watari! What pairing is this gonna be? I'm a big fan of Tsuzuki/Watari (No one really likes   
that pairing! Why not? It's cute!) so it'll probably be that. Yeah, if you stop reading now, I don't blame you. *Gets trampled by the  
Tsuzuki/Hisoka supporters* @_@ Ugha...I think I've broken something vital...anyhoo, so onto the real fic! It's pretty light-hearted until  
the end, so yeah. I think this is the longest author notes I've ever written...-_-;; Warning: I wax long and poetic about Watari's morning  
routine. Be warned. Oh yeah, I'm not sure if you see Watari's lab during any time, so I'm making up the description of it. It's my vision of  
his lab.  
  
Chapter One  
  
Beep. Beep. Beep.  
  
A grumble came from a mass of tangled sheets and golden hair. The monstrosity shifted, and soon after a head popped out, glaring impartially  
at the world with golden-brown eyes.   
  
Watari *really* didn't want to get out of bed. His freakish dream (Which by now he couldn't even remember)  
had kept him up for an hour, and he had finally fallen back to sleep about an hour ago. He was normally a morning person, but now Watari just  
flopped back down and contemplated the consequences of being late to the office. Tsuzuki was usually late, and Tatsumi usually let it go. But  
then again, it was Tsuzuki, no one could truly stay angry at some one so happy, and Watari didn't think he had the gengkiness to pull that off  
this time. So if he was late, the would be Dire Consequences.   
  
Sighing, he hauled himself out of the warm covers and stumbled for the bathroom, grabbing some clothes that looked like they matched along the way.  
He stripped himself of his nightclothes unceremoniously, and turned the shower on at full blast and nearly scalding. Ah, just the way he liked it.  
He stepped into the heated spray and let the water wash over him. Showers were great. He stood enjoying it, wetting down his hair and reveling  
in the feel.   
  
After a few minutes of simply standing, he made a face and turned to the tricky task of washing his hair. He glopped out a generous  
amount of his favorite shampoo (Apple and strawberry scented) and lathered it in. After making sure it was all lathered (a good ten minutes) he rinsed  
it and picked up the bottle again. Shaking it, he frowned. He really must remember to buy more today, or tomorrow would be hell. He hated his hair  
being unclean. It was a hassle, but he liked it. Dumping the reamining contains on his tresses, Watari finished with his daily hygiene ritual. He  
gave his body a good brief scrub and stepped out of the shower, lamenting the loss of heat. Turning to his sink, he bushed his teeth and washed his face  
a little better. Watari put on his clothes and finally walked out of the bathroom, a good hour after he started.[1]  
  
"Ahh, now I feel awake!" Watari felt his smile and genkiness return, and hummed as he picked up his brush. Running it through the long tresses, Watari  
carefully detangled the wet golden mass. He frowned as he came to a particularly bad snangle and had to pull hard to get it undone, losing a few hairs along  
the way. It took a good twenty minutes to get the hair brushed, and by that time his brush looked like it had a run-in with a hay bale. Placing the brush   
down, he grabbed his favorite hair ribbon (A nice long black one made of silk) and tied it in it's customary position around his hair at neck level. Feeling  
much better and definately more genki, Watari summoned 003 to his shoulder and fairly skipped off to work.  
  
when he got there, Tatsumi was starting in on some files that he had left the day before. The Secretary of Death (As Tsuzuki and Watari secretly called him)  
gave the genki scientist a slight glare before returning to the rather intimidating pile of paper. Tatsumi's hair was frazzled, and the slight glaze in his  
eyes told Watari that obviously Mr. Secretary hadn't had much sleep the night before. He shoved aside the pang of sympathy and waved to Tatsumi and skipped   
down the hall towards his lab, ignoring the hot glare given to morning people by those who are not.  
  
The lab, as always, gave one a feel of organized chaos. Papers and supplies littered the desktops in seemingly random patterns. Watari sweatdropped. He'd  
forgotten to clean up his lab, again. That was the...fourth month in a row where the lab had gone unorganized. But Watari liked it this way. He may be a   
doctor and scientist, but he wasn't exactly neat. It didn't matter. It was his lab, and he knew where everything was, so it was okay.  
  
Shoving aside a pile of month-old notes, Watari reached across his desk and clicked on the computer. Imagine, computers in the afterlife. No scrolls, no  
angels with trumpets announcing names, just computers and file cabinets. Watari chuckled as he shuffled through the remnants of last night's work. He winced  
as a paper with a rather suspicious-looking green goo in a beaker on top fell off his, ahem, "workstation" (Tatsumi called it the "Disaster Area." At least it wasn't   
as bad as Tsuzuki's room...) and landed on the floor.  
  
"I'm going to have to clean that up..." Watari eyed the paper and substance with distaste. "Maybe I can get a Gushousin to do it..."  
  
Carefully avoiding the puddle, Watari made his way to the door. Looking out, he watched for anybody.  
  
"Damn...no flying clothed chickens in sight. I guess I have to do it.[2]" Wrinkling his nose, he headed back into his lab and headed for the broom closet.  
Pulling out the mop, Watari prepared to mop up the mess. Just as he touched the goo with the mop, a sense of deja vu swept over him-  
  
-"...Honestly, Watari, why can't you be more careful, you little demon"-  
  
-and Watari suddenly couldn't breath. It was as if his lungs were full of dust. He collapsed to the floor, coughing and wheezing as he forced air into his lungs.   
After it had subsided, he lay on the floor, shaken. he hadn't the strength to get up just yet, and if he did, he would fall right back down. He didn't think his   
legs would support him. So he lay feebly stretched on the floor, breathing harshly. What had that been? It was as if it were a flash of memory, or a dream long  
forgotten. But memory was impossible. Watari remembered nothing of before he died. This was an old mystery in the Enmachou. Nothing made Watari remember, not  
even extensive memory therapy magic to the point of almost wiping him out. So it was impossible that simply mopping up a spill would make Watari remember. Right?  
  
Watari shivered as breath seemed to run across his ear, almost like a lover's whisper.  
  
"We all fall down..."  
  
"Dear Watari-kun..."  
  
~TBC~  
  
AN: Ha! Cliffhanger! XP! Next part out soon! (I actually have motivation for this fic!) Reviews? Flames? Chocolate-covered bishie?  
  
Notes:  
[1]Yes, it takes that long. My friend has long thick hair too, and her showers are all 45minutes-1 hour long.  
  
[2]Come on, he's not afraid to touch strange substances. He's already dead. 


	3. Chapter Two

AN- Well, I'm gonna get to writing this. This chapter will be more pointless babble attempting to come up with her plot. -_-;;;; And look! I've learned Watari's birthdate!  
He's an Aries like me!! ^_^!! Now, watch as I drivel on and procrastinate attempting to connect all of this and make a plot. -_-;;;; IN this, Kiddie-Watari has a much more  
different personality than our genki dead scientist. You people should know what war I'm speaking of in this part.  
  
Oh yeah, and I've designated a theme song for Watari. It's called "Super Drive" and it's the opening song of Gravitation. The lyrics fit 'Tari-chan (and Tsuzu-chan, for that  
matter) very well, IMHO. ^_^  
  
Pockets Full Of Ashes Chapter Two  
  
~~~~  
  
"Watari!!"  
  
The young boy turned around, shoulder-length blond hair flowing with him. His serious countenance lightened a little at the sight of the person who had called his name.   
  
"Tsuzane!"  
  
The girl caught up with him, hitting him on the shoulder and laughing. "Ba~ka! My name is Suzanne! You should know by now!"  
  
He smiled slightly. "I know. It's not my fault you gaijins don't pronounce the way you spell.(1)"  
  
She pouted, but the expression was soon wisked away by her everlasting cheerfulness. "I'm surprised the townspeople haven't lynched me yet."  
  
His face fell slightly as he remembered the reason for that statement. "Yeah. I'm surprised that your family even wanted to move here, with how it's been after the war."  
  
Suzanne looked down at her feet. "Hiroshima and Nagisaki are still plains of disentigrated rubble. With that reminder, who would want to fight?"  
  
Yutaka Watari looked at his only friend in the world, thinking. She was British, and her father had been with the small relief force sent to help Japan recover from the ravages  
of war. However, he had decided to take along his wife and they had moved permanently to Kyoto. Suzanne talked with no accent, but her parents did, and were sometimes incoherent.  
Even now, seventeen years after the war, the memory was still fresh. The first day of school they had both been in the same class, and were forced together as the outcasts. Suzanne,  
with her name and parents. Watari, also with his parents(or rather, the lack thereof) and his distinctly un-Japanese appearance. Suzanne looked more like a native than he did. She  
had soft brown eyes, long shimmering brown hair done up in two pigtails, and tanned skin from outside work. Watari, however, looked like the gaijin one of the pair. With his thick   
golden hair, glimmering golden-brown eyes, and skin so pale it looked like porcelain. Suzanne often complained that he was prettier than she was, and sadly, it was true. It didn't  
know where he gotit though. His father he never knew, and his mother had died when he was very young, leaving only impressions of dark hair, a soft voice and warm sadness. He lived   
with his aunt, who hated his appearance. She was very nationalistic, and also hated Suzanne with a passion. He was treated little better than a slave, forced to do all the housework.  
She sometimes beat him too, but she was careful to leave the bruises in places that wouldn't be casually seen. He didn't tell anyone of his life where he lived.  
  
"Ne, 'Tari-chan, want to hear a song?"  
  
He looked up from where he was watching the ground. "Song?"  
  
Suzanne nodded emphatically. "Umph. It's a children's rhyme from Europe. My parents taught it to me. Want to hear it?"  
  
He smiled. "Sure."  
  
She began skipping off, singing in English (which he had been learning from her ever since they became friends; he was fairly fluent now) as she went.  
  
"Ring around the rosie  
  
Pockets full of posies  
  
Ashes, ashes  
  
We all fall down!"  
  
At the last line, she twirled around and fell on the grass, laughing.  
  
Watari walked to where she had fallen. "That song is nice."  
  
She smiled up at him, eyes full of happiness and cheerfulness and spring, a never-ending spiral of light and fluff and all the goodness of the world mixed with ice cream and puppy dogs.  
  
"Honto?"  
  
"Honto ni."  
  
She opened her mouth to say something-  
  
-and she dissapeared.  
  
"Suzanne!!??"  
  
He looked around. The scenery had changed dramatically. Snow fell form the grey sky, slowly covering everything. He stood in the remains of a burnt house, nothing more than a pile of ash  
and sticks. Stuck on the tip of one of the blackened timbers was a red ribbon, fluttering in the cold wind. The ash was everywhere, in the wind, in his hair, on his clothes.  
  
He knew that ribbon very well.  
  
It always came with it's mate, holding up two identical pigtails of soft, brown hair that framed a soft happy face...  
  
"Tsuza-chan?"  
  
Voices came from everywhere, bleeding into one and fading out into millions.  
  
"...terminal disease, the bomb sickness. No more than a year..."  
  
"...horrible gaijins, they don't deserve to live..."  
  
"...do it tonight, while they're sleeping..."  
  
"...make sure the girl dies...."  
  
He fell to his knees, everything else unheeded.  
  
Ash. Ash everywhere.  
  
"...We all fall down!"  
  
"Suzaaaaaaaaaannnneeeeeeee!!!!!!"  
  
~~~  
  
Watari jerked out of his bed, landing on the floor. The momentary pain jarred his senses, and he flailed for a few seconds, trying to get hold on reality. Finally he freed himself, and sat panting.  
Another weird dream like last night, but this one was more...substantial, like a memory. But now the images had faded, and all he could scrabble for was a sense of despair and loss. Loss of what?  
Ugh, this was no time to dwell on this. He clambered back into bed, and lied there, drifting. He would not think of it now. But...one question nagged at him to answer it NOW. Was he finally   
remembering his lost past? Other than basic info such as name, birthdate, weight, height, bloodtype, birthplace, etc., he had no other memory of his past or who he was. Tatsumi said it was selective  
trauma amnesia or something like that. But that didn't explain why even exstensive magical methods didn't work. So, were the memories returning? He shivered slightly, the air conditioner was still  
too high. He curled up and deciding to finally go to sleep. As he descended back into the depths of dreams, his last conscious thought was that if he was remembering, than he had a distinct feeling  
that he reallt didn't want to.  
  
The air condintioner continued to hum on.  
  
~TBC~  
  
AN - .....-_-;;;;; I'm not going to talk about it now. Oh yeah, anyone notice a similarity between Suzanne and a certain other Shinigami? Reviews? Flames? Chocolate-covered bishounen?  
  
(1)Japanese people literally say things as they're spelled, as their written language is based on sounds. Therefore, "Suzanne" with the "ne" on the end, if she literally translated it to kanji, would  
be read by the Japanese as "Tsu-zan-ne" ^^;;;;;;;; 


	4. Chapter Three

AN - Wheeeee!!! No more plot hitches for me!! XDXD!!! I'm on the ball now. Lesse, more daily life, a cute Wat/Tsu fluff scene, an odd mission and even more odd  
coincidance line this chapter. Enjoy  
  
This chapter may help explain my side series, "It's The Little Things That Kill You", as the cookie-stealing incident is mentioned here.  
  
Pockets Full of Ashes Chapter Three  
  
"Waaaaataaaaariiiiiiii!!!!"  
  
Watari halted, startled by the sudden yell and the small black object that hurtled towards him. He froze instinctively, and it landed on him, latching to his chest  
and knocking him off his feet. He landed on the floor, sprawled and dazed, as the object-no, person-sat up. He blinked, and found chibi-Tsuzuki, complete with ears   
and tail, sitting on his chest with teary eyes.  
  
"Tsuzuki...?"  
  
The chibi-fied Shinigami latched onto Watari, crying. "He's being mean to me again, Watari!!! He took away my cookies!!"  
  
"He...?"  
  
"Hisoka!!" Big purple eyes filled with tears stared at him, hoping for him to make it better. Watari could never resist those eyes.  
  
"Maaa, Tsuzuki, daijoubu! Hisoka is like that, he didn't mean anything! Now, let's go get you some more cookies, ne?"  
  
Tsuzuki was instantly cheerful again, a huge grin lighting up his chibi face. "Watari!!! Arigatou!!!" he glomped the scientist, estactic. watari choked and blushed.  
  
He hauled himself to his feet, holding the chibi-Tsuzuki. *I will not think hentai thoughts about Tsuzuki!!!* He chided himself. He may be attracted to the older   
Shinigami, but he doubted that Tsuzuki returned those feelings. he was just a good friend to the childish man, and so a good friend he would be. And that plan involved  
buying some cookies.  
  
"Now, let's go get those cookies!" Tsuzuki jumped out of Watari's arms, dechibifying as he did so. He grinned at Watari, and he blushed again.  
  
*Must not think bad thoughts! Must not think bad thoughts!!!* That became Watari's mantra, and he continued to chant it as Tsuzuki grabbed his hand and dragged him  
outside the office building to the sakura trees where they usually flew to Chijou. He had to stop, though, because flying required intense concentration, and he didn't  
want to end up in several pieces.  
  
He made that special adjustment, and he felt himself shifting, the world distorting and sliding. It stretched undeterminedly, until it shattered and he was in Chijou.  
  
Tsuzuki turned to him, ever-present smile wide and undomitable. "Where do you want to go to get the cookies?"  
  
Watari thought about it, unconciously nibbling on a finger as he deliberated. "Umm.....I'm not sure...maybe that little coffee and pastry shop in Shinjiku...?"  
  
Tsuzuki thought too, though his thoughts were straying more towards Watari and how cute he looked biting his finger like that. Not that Watari knew that.  
  
"Yeah, I love their caramel cookies."  
  
Watari beamed. "Then it's decided, Tsuzuki-kun! Iku yo!" Grabbing Tsuzuki's hand (and ignoring the little thrill that resulted) they headed for the shop.  
  
~At the shop~  
  
"Yokatta!!!"  
  
Watari sweatdropped as Tsuzuki began to dig in to the rather...big piles of cookies and whatnot at their table. The other patrons of the cafe were staring at them  
strangely, and he felt uncomfortable. Tsuzuki wasn't bothered (he was used to being stared at) and Watari couldn't bear to break the man's happiness by suggesting they  
head back. But how were they going to carry all this anyway...? Some mysteries were better left unanswered. Though, he had never seen Tsuzuki eat this much sweets   
before.  
  
*He must /really/ be having a pity fest about his cookies...*  
  
Although he didn't know it, Tsuzuki's attention was actually focused on him, as the purple-eyed Shinigami studied him.  
  
*He's awfully quiet for Watari....but he's got his "This is a problem I must figure out" look. Maybe he's trying to figure out how I'm going to eat all this. I'm not   
sure, either...maybe he should eat some! Yeah! Can't let sweets go to waste!*  
  
"Watari? Why don't you eat some?"  
  
Tsuzuki's voice nearly gave the man in question a heart attack. He had been so focused on the pile of sweets and his thoughts that he hadn't been paying attention to  
Tsuzuki.  
  
"Eat...some...?"  
  
The man nodded excitedly, childish manner evident in his actions. "Yeah! here, try this, it's my favorite!"  
  
He held out an innocent-looking pastry. Watari accepted it readily enough, although something disturbed him about it. There was something about it, that made Watari  
uneasy.  
  
"watari?"  
  
Tsuzuki's voice barely made an imprint in his thoughts. The man's voice was almost drowned out by a child's voice, a young girl, running a commentary that seemed painfully   
familiar...  
  
"...and then these are my favorite! They're really good! Why don't you try one Watari?"  
  
"...you alright, Watari?"  
  
"...you alright, Watari?"  
  
He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to block out the voices.   
  
"Watari!!" The louder voice, along with gratuitous shaking of his shoulders, snapped Watari out of his head. He blinked, suddenly very tired, and looked up at the one who  
had rescued him.  
  
"Tsu..zu..ki..?"  
  
His eyes were full of worry and concern, comforting purple. *Not brown...that's good* Watari didn't know where that thought came from, but he was too tired to care.  
  
"I...think I'll go hom now...Tsuzuki..."  
  
He nodded. "Okay. Let me get a bag."  
  
This snapped Watari out of his confusion. "What?"  
  
"I'm coming home with you!"  
  
"You really shouldn't do that...I'm all right..."  
  
Tsuzuki sook his hard empathically. "No way. You looked like you were in pain back there. I'm going to make sure you're okay."  
  
Watari summoned up an once of his genkiness, mangaing a smile. "Thanks, Tsuzuki."  
  
The man beamed. "No problem! Now, let's get you home, ne?"  
  
Helping him stagger to his feet and load the sweets into a bag, the pair of Shinigami made their way back to Meifu.  
  
Tsuzuki had to help Watari during the flight, as the scientist's concentration was slipping. They headed for watari's apartment.  
  
~At the apartment~  
  
"You really shouldn't do this, Tsuzuki.'  
  
The man pouted. "but I'm worried about you! And I wanna play a game with you!"  
  
Watari felt his will collapse right then and there. "Okay. You can stay the night, Tsuzuki."  
  
"Yokatta!!!!" He bounced around the small living room for a while, then landed atthe table, ears and tail present.  
  
'What game should we play first???"  
  
"Well, how about..."  
  
And so it continued late into the night.  
  
The pair of Shinigami were on the couch. After a movie-fest, Watari's strength had finally failed him and he had fallen asleep on Tsuzuki's shoulder. He smiled down down  
at the sleeping man.  
  
*Maaa....Watari's really pretty! I wish we could just stay like this forever.*  
  
Tsuzuki continued to study his sleeping friend, until sleep claimed him as well.  
  
Both men slept on peacefully until dawn, for once not plagued by nightmares.  
  
~TBC~  
AN: Well, that chapter was pure, unaldulterated Wat/Tsu fluuf and sap. I honestly meant to put plot development into this, but the interaction just proved to be too much.  
^^;;;;  
  
Reviews? Flames? Chocolate-covered bishie? 


	5. Chapter Four

Yay! Inspiration struck! And I managed to fit Muraki into this!!! Yaaaay! And…I finished the entire series! Woo!  
  
Recommended Listening Music: Love Me (The Yami ending song! Yay!)  
  
Chapter Four  
  
"Ehh?? Me and Watari have a mission with each other?"  
  
Tsuzuki stared at kaichou, confusion written all over his face. "Why not Hisoka and me? Aren't we partners?"  
  
Kaichou nodded. "Indeed you are. However, this mission requires you two to be together, as Hisoka's skills are not needed."  
  
Watari got over his shock and managed to ask a question. "What is the mission?"  
  
"The mission….is to go over a certain Kazutaka Tatsuhara's medical records."  
  
**Osaka**  
  
No one really noticed the man sitting in the corner of the café. Sure, his pale skin and hair made him stand out, but for some reason eyes just seemed to slide over him. Dressed all in white, the man sat with his back to the window, quietly sipping his tea. Platinum hair fell over his face, obscuring it from view, but the waitress who served him was sighing happily. He simply wasn't that remarkable, so he went unnoticed. Therefore, no one also noticed the evil grin that spread across his face, nor the glint of a malicious eye hidden by metal strands.  
  
Grinning, Kazutaka Muraki anticipated the coming event and enjoyed the rest of his tea.  
  
**Meifu, Kanoe Kaichou's Office**  
  
Dead silence reigned. The two Shinigami stood with identical expressions, shock and hatred warring on their features.  
  
Watari was the first to recover. "Kazutaka Tatsuhara….as in Kazutaka Muraki's father?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
Tsuzuki now recovered. "Are you telling me that we have to go digging through that...that *man's* father's stuff and risk an encounter with him?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
Watari struggled to hold back Tsuzuki from killing (again) their boss. "Oi, oi, Tsuzuki, calm down!"  
  
"I REFUSE to do this!"  
  
Watari succeeded in his efforts and pinned Tsuzuki to the floor. "Maa, maa, Tsuzuki. It's his father, not Muraki himself. We may not even hear of him in town!"  
  
Tsuzuki relaxed and conceded to the blond scientist. It was Watari, he couldn't yell at him.  
  
"….Very well, I'll do it."  
  
Kanoe kaichou smiled. "Good. You leave tomorrow. Your objective is to file his things and bring them here. We need to know just what the Kazutaka's have been researching for generations."  
  
"Hai, kaichou!"  
  
"Haaai…."  
  
"Now don't look so glum you two. Chances are you'll never meet him. Now go pack. You leave first thing."  
  
**Watari's Apartment**  
  
"Well, 003, I'll be on a little trip for a while. I've ordered Hisoka to keep an eye on you. Don't give him too much trouble, okay? I'll be back in just a day or two! See you soon!" Watari walked out of his apartment and closed the door, his genki smile fading from his lips.  
  
"I really don't like this mission….nothing fits into place..!!!"  
  
Sudden pain shot through him, robbing him of breath. He fell to the floor, choking. An evil voice echoed through his memory, a ghost of forgotten past.  
  
"…Itsukuushi…"  
  
Darkness surrounded his vision, yanking from the blessed light and filling him with despair.  
  
"…My beautiful doll…"  
  
He gave in to the darkness, falling through the slats in his mind.  
  
"….Let me see you break…"  
  
Darkness.  
  
"My poor human doll."  
  
~TBC~  
  
AN:…… I really don't like this chapter. I really don't. 


	6. Chapter Five

AN: Yay! More chapters! Woo! ^^ I am on a roll. XD  
  
………The main singer of the Hong Kong Knife sounds disturbingly like Watari, no? ;;;  
  
Chapter Five  
  
Tsuzuki paced back and forth in the small room nervously, his eyes on the still figure in the bed. Watari lay still; skin nearly blending in with the pristine whiteness of the sheets and walls. Tsuzuki never had liked white much. It was always too clean, and now with Muraki, he had a whole new hatred of anything light-colored. Thankfully the mass of golden silk Watari called hair jarred the rest of the room into some semblance of color.  
  
Tsuzuki continued his pacing, recalling the exact events that had led to this. He had been early (for once) and was feasting on some delicious sugar treats. Hisoka had insulted him as usual, and he had gobbled down the rest of the sweets in puppy tears. He had then dragged himself, moping about Hisoka and the assignment, to Watari's apartment, as the scientist had a bad habit of being even more tardy than Tsuzuki. The sight that greeted him was anything but normal. Watari had been sprawled out on the floor, unconscious. Tsuzuki, slightly panicking, had rushed his friend to the medical office right away. Unfortunately, the stand-in doctor was unable to identify just what had caused the blond Shinigami's collapse. So now Tsuzuki was worrying in the medical room, hoping nothing was seriously wrong with the object of his rather tentative affections.  
  
Giving up on wearing more holes in the tile floor, Tsuzuki flopped down in the single chair beside the bed. He studied the unconscious Watari, hoping to distract himself. This, however, caused his thoughts to go down a rather bad path.  
  
*I really hope Muraki isn't there. After last time….I'm not sure what I would do should I see him. I guess that's why they sent Watari with me instead of Hisoka. We both might go on a homicidal rage in his presence. Watari doesn't have any personal arguments against the doctor yet, so he would at least keep a clear head about it. I doubt I would.*  
  
Tsuzuki was still in the middle of his thoughts, so he didn't quite notice it when Watari's eyes fluttered open. However, he did notice when the genki blonde's voice drifted to him.  
  
"Ara? When did I get here? I was about to go on that mission with Tsuzuki…"  
  
"Watari!! You're okay!"  
  
Watari turned his head to see Tsuzuki, complete with ears, tail, paws, and a pathetically happy expression[1] next to the bed he was lying on.  
  
He blinked. Since when was he the one lying in the medical bed? It was usually some one else here and he was the doctor.  
  
"Tsuzuki...how did I get here?"  
  
Tsuzuki's large eyes shimmered with tears. "I came to meet you and found you lying outside your apartment unconcious. I didn't know what had happened so I brought you here. How do you feel, Watari? Do you hurt anywhere? Are you thirsty? Hungry? I saved a cake for you. Do you want- "  
  
"Oi, Tsuzuki, calm down! I feel fine!"  
  
Instantly the tears were gone and the smiles were back. "Yokatta! I'm really happy you're okay, Watari! Do you want the cake?"  
  
He held out something that conceivably had been small cupcake or pastry of that sort. It was covered in white icing that was dripping on the Shinigami's coat sleeve. It sort of leaned towards one side, and seemed to have taken on the mentality and pose of a sick chicken.  
  
Watari sweatdropped.  
  
"Ahh..."  
  
The chibi eyes began to fill with tears again. "You don't want it? I saved it for you..."  
  
Not wishing to upset the older Shinigami any further, Watari quickly grabbed it. "Ahh, hai, hai, I want it. It looks very...ah, good. I'll eat it later, okay? I'm not that hungry now."  
  
Tsuzuki was appeased. The puppy additions dissapeared and he became serious.  
  
"Watari, you don't know why you collapsed?"  
  
He thought about it for a moment, then shook his head. "No. I simply don't know. I remember closing my door, standing there for a moment, and then I wake up here. I just don't know what happened."  
  
Tsuzuki contemplated this, his eyes downcast and facial expression serious.  
  
"I wonder if it has something to do with this mission..."  
  
"Ah, sou da!"  
  
Tsuzuki started, surprised by Watari's sudden exclamation.  
  
"Ehh...nanda? Nanda?"  
  
Watari grinned. "I just remembered what I was thinking before I passed out. I was thinking about how I didn't like this mission because the facts didn't fit together."  
  
Just then the assistant docter stepped in, alerted by the noise in the room. "Ahh, Watari-san, you're awake?"  
  
The Shinigami nodded. "Hai, for a few minutes now."  
  
The doctor smiled. "That's good. Kanoe kaichou's getting on me to get you out of here and onto that mission already."  
  
Both Shinigami sweatdropped. "Let me guess....by Tatsumi's tactful urging?" Tsuzuki mumbled to Watari.  
  
"Of course. Can't waste money to care for a comatose Shinigami, can we?" Watari whispered back.  
  
"Well, Watari-san, if you could stand up please?"  
  
Watari and Tsuzuki shared a glance, then Watari tiredly hauled himself out of the bed. Sometimes, he really hated Tatsumi.  
  
~*Meeting Room*~  
  
"Watari-san, it is good to see you awake and well. What happened?"  
  
Tatsumi's concern soothed Watari's irritation at the secretary somewhat.  
  
"I'm not sure what happened myself, Tatsumi-san. I remember standing outside my door thinking about the mission, and then, well, I remember waking up in the medical office."  
  
"No memories between those times?"  
  
"None."  
  
Tatsumi frowned. "Well, as much as I am concerned about your health, we can't delay this mission much longer. Are you able to start today?"  
  
Watari nodded, resigned. He hadn't expected any sick leave anyway, and he didn't feel ill in the first place either. They might as well start the mission.  
  
Tatsumi smiled at the pair. "Good. Then hurry and leave, you two. This delay has caused us time we can not afford."  
  
"You mean, more than you're willing to spend." Watari mumbled under his breath.  
  
"What was that, Watari-san?"  
  
"Ahh, nothing, nothing!"  
  
"Okay then, if you are ready, then you may leave. We need this information very badly." Tsuzuki and Watari nodded, then left the meeting room, unknowing of Tatsumi's watchful eyes observing them.  
  
The secretary remained in the room, holding a pose of deep thought. Finally, he spoke to himself softly.  
  
"I just hope that the secrets uncovered on this mission will not hold dangerous reprecussions. Especially for Watari-san..."  
  
Tatsumi straightened and left the room, his stride businesslike and purposeful.  
  
~*Osaka*~  
  
"Mou! Sometimes I wish Tatsumi would lay off the schedules and learn that late isn't necessarily bad!" Watari ran a hand through his hair, the golden mass shifting only slightly before dutifully going back to an arranged mess.  
  
Tsuzuki's eyes wobbled slightly. "And he didn't even tell us where this place is! Tatsumi hidoii!!!!"  
  
Watari smiled wryly. "Yes, hidoii. Now we have to find this place ourselves. Sometimes I swear Tatsumi is some sort of closet sadist."  
  
His temporary partner nodded enthusiastically. "He's so cruel to us!"  
  
The scientist stretched, extending his body for every inch it could muster. "Well, no use grumbling about co-workers. We'd better start searching for this place, before Tatsumi has more reasons to cut our pay."  
  
"Hai!" With Tsuzuki's cheerful affirmative, the pair started off in a random direction, hoping to find some clues before nightfall.  
  
~*?*~  
  
Cold florescent lighting glinted off machinery, giving the area an eerie glow. The light reflected off the room's sole occupant in the same way, creating a frigid sterile feel to the man.  
  
This man was currently scanning through mountains of paper documents, looking for a certain one. Light flashed off of his glasses as he turned his head to another paper. He smiled, a thin malicious smirk that matched the coldness of his surroundings, and picked up the paper. His smirk got wider as read. The man carefully placed the document on it's original and bowed his head, face hidden by silver shining strands. he chuckled, a low evil sound.  
  
"Well, well, well, Tsuzuki-san. It seems that now I have a new reason for you to visit me...a reason that has become very personal to you. Undoubtedly we will have a dispute over the ownership of the reason, but that is not important."  
  
He smiled as he looked at the paper once more.  
  
"'Yukata Watari', hmm? I wonder how he will feel about the outcome of the events to come...."  
  
The paper was sent spiraling towards the ground by an unfelt breeze, and Kazutaka Muraki laughed.  
  
~*TBC*~  
  
AN: Urgh.....I have a hard time capturing Muraki. He's so evil!! I know, I'm stalling the meeting and stuff, but I need some time to figure out how to write the final conflict. Any suggestions and add-ons to the story you are welcome to mention. Reviews? Flames? Chocolate-covered bishounen?  
  
[1] Yeah, the face he makes when Hisoka came to save him from Muraki during the poker game. Where his tail wagged really really fast. XD 


	7. Chapter Six

AN: Whee.....watch Mi-chan attempt to write a conflict. _ I guess I'm just better at introspective oneshots...hmm..*thinks about that one* I guess I am. Anyhoo, watch the suckiness of this chapter. -_-;; Oh yeah, I've just recently noticed that I've gotten their first and last names mixed up. ^^;; I wonder why they all call each other by their last names....? _  
  
Chapter Six  
  
Watari frowned as a chill wind blew through his hair and caused it to toss fretfully. He knew it was winter, but that had been a bit too cold for this climate. He thought about it some more, then concluded that he was getting paranoid.  
  
"Watari no baka. This stupid mission's going to your head..." He mumbled as he continued walking down the street.  
  
He and Tsuzuki had been here for several days, and what they had uncovered so far was unsettling. Of course, what they had uncovered was frightfully small, but since they were dealing with Muraki, or at least a relative of his, that wasn't too surprising. He had to have got his tendencies from somebody, after all.  
  
Watari continued walking down the street, ignoring the milling tourists and residents as he pondered the facts they had gathered so far. He was so engrossed in his thoughts that he didn't notice the running girl until she ran straight into him.  
  
He staggered back from the impact, barely avoiding a rather undignified fall. The girl, however, wasn't so lucky. She had fallen backwards, and was now sitting one the ground, dazed. Watari offered her his hand, summoning up a sunny, if apologetic, smile, and asked if she was all right.  
  
She blinked at his hand, then instantly blushed and took it. She stood up and bowed deeply.  
  
"I'm really, really sorry, sir. I wasn't watching where I was going."  
  
Watari grinned, and lazily waved a hand. "No need to apologize, I wasn't watching either. All you all right?"  
  
She looked up and smiled, happy that he wasn't mad at her. She was pretty, he decided, and if he were inclined in that direction he would have considered asking her out.  
  
"I'm fine, mister...? I don't believe I've seen you around here, and I come here often."  
  
He smiled faintly. Well, it had been a rather...long time since he'd last been here. "I'm visiting family. Ah! My name is Watari!" He stated, offering his hand.  
  
She took his offered hand, smiling. "I'm Hikari. Nice to meet you, Watari- san. Ah!" She jumped, remembering something. "That's right, I'm going to be late! I'm sorry I couldn't stay to chat, Watari-san....demo..."  
  
Watari waved her off. "It's okay, Hikari-san. You shouldn't keep some one waiting on my account."  
  
A bright smile. "Thank you. It was nice meeting you! Goodbye!" Then she was off, running again.  
  
When she was gone, Watari allowed the frown that he had been feeling slip onto his face. Something about that girl disturbed him. She had had the palest eyes....a shade of gray that he had seen before. A colorless pale that gave an air of mystery....  
  
He stiffened. He knew where he had seen them before. Muraki. His eyes had the same pale gray color. His frown deepened. Was she a relative of his? The odds of her having those eyes and them not being related were too great. Perhaps she was a cousin, or such. At least her pupils hadn't been slitted.  
  
He sighed. This may have just been an accidental meeting, but he should still tell Tsuzuki about it. If he still had relatives...  
  
Watari looked at the place where she had run off to. The girl was no where in sight. He sighed again, turned, and headed for the hotel.  
  
~*Hotel*~  
  
Tsuzuki lied on his stomach, enjoying the fluffly bed. Soon, Watari would come home and kick him off of it, but he was enjoying it while it lasted. He claimed that Watari's bed was fluffier than his own, but not really. He just wanted an excuse to lie there and and sense the blond Shinigami's remaining presence that clung there. From this position, if he breathed in, he could smell the other's shampoo. Peaches. Everything about Watari seemed a fuzzy golden color. He closed his eyes and just breathed. Of course, as is natural when you lie on a comfortable bed, he fell asleep.  
  
//He was in a dark room, back to back with Watari. He could see nothing beyond the small overhead light that shone down on them. The darkness that surrounded them was total. He shouldn't be afraid, but he was, horribly so. His hands twitched as memories of darkness started to surface. He pushed them down ruthlessly. He couldn't let himself get to himself, not when he had an outside threat to worry about, and Watari. The scientist wasn't as strong as he was. He needed to watch out for him.  
  
A laugh rang out from the darkness, a sensual vibration that seemed to form from the darkness itself.  
  
Both he and Watari jumped, startled by the chilling sound. It had been impossible to pinpoint exactly where it had come from, and he guessed that they weren't supposed to know where it had come from. His breath hitched; he knew that laugh. Knew who it was without a doubt. He heard Watari gasp faintly, and he shifted towards the blond, partly to remind Watari that he was there, and partly to reassure himself. He steeled himself, but his hands still shook anyway. It shouldn't scare him. But it did. It frightened him more than anything else. He opened his mouth, and named the voice.  
  
"Muraki."  
  
The laugh sounded again, a lazy chuckle, low and dark. He appeared suddenly, seeming to melt from the darkness. He had substituted his normal pristine white suit for a suit and jacket that seemed to melt into the darkness. He wondered faintly why he could see him against the absolute darkness that surrounded the pathetic ring of light. The doctor's pale hair and skin stood out brilliantly against the dark, but instead of clashing, it seemed to fit together. He suddenly realized that he couldn't see the doctor's hands, despite the fact that he knew that Muraki's hands were at his sides. Gloves. He was wearing gloves.  
  
The evil man smirked, his eyes lazily wandering over them. "It is nice to see you again, Tsuzuki-san. And I don't believe I've meet your friend." He cocked his head, watching the blond with interest.  
  
He shifted, placing himself between Muraki and Watari. "What do you want this time, Muraki?" His voice wasn't afraid, to his surprise, but rather low and rough with anger.  
  
Muraki raised an eyebrow, apparently surprised at his tone of voice as well. "What do I want?" His eyes traveled over the pair, watching Tsuzuki with amused lust, and Watari with sincere curiosity. He smirked suddenly, a faint laugh escaping his lips.  
  
He pulled his lips back in a snarl. "What now??"  
  
The man simply smiled at his show of anger. "I was merely curious as to why this man would be in your dream, and not the boy."  
  
"What??"//  
  
Tsuzuki awoke with a gasp. He stared at the wall, focusing in on reality. He blinked. He was in Watari's room in the hotel, lying on Watari's bed. No Muraki. No living darkness. Tsuzuki relaxed, sighing, and flopped over on his back to stare at the ceiling. That dream was vividly real. Too real. He remembered what the dream-Muraki had said. Strangely, he had had a point. Why had it been Watari? Usually, when he had bad dreams about Muraki, Hisoka was with him in them. Why had it been Watari this time? He had a terrible feeling that his dream was going to come true. He didn't want Watari tangled up with Muraki.  
  
The sound of the door opened startled Tsuzuki, making him jump and sit up. His breath caught in his throat.  
  
"I'm back, Tsuzuki! Are you here?"  
  
The sound of his friend's voice relaxed Tsuzuki immensly, and he felt a genuine smile spread across his face. "Welcome back, Watari!"  
  
The blond poked his head through the door, making a face when he saw where his friend was currently sitting. "Mou, Tsuzuki! It's *my* bed, you know!"  
  
Tsuzuki made his trademark puppy eyes, and Watari flinched inwardly. Nobody could resist those large, and now slightly wobbly eyes. He sighed, letting an affectionate smile pull his lips. "Okay, okay. I know you like my bed. You don't have to move."  
  
The eyes instantly turned sparkly and shimmering with happiness. "Hontou ni?? Thank you, Watari!!!"  
  
The blond Shinigami opened jis mouth to reply, but just then, a bright flash blocked all sight, and Tsuzuki fell into a world of darkness...  
  
~TBC~ AN: Yay! Finally getting (somewhat) to action! I was going to have this cute little admission of feelings scene, but the chapter was getting long. ^^;; So you people got a cliffy. Muah. ^o^ 


	8. Chapter Seven

AN: wow, it's been forever since my lasy update. Thankies to Lorraine Ulrich for both the inspiration and planning for the continuatiuon of this fic!  
  
Reccomended Listening: Turn Back Time (Komm, Suesser Todd) from End of Evangelion  
  
Chapter Six  
  
Tsuzuki awoke to the cold feeling of lying on metal. No good memories ever started this way, so he quickly opened his eyes. His suspicions were confirmed as he saw that he didn't know where he was.  
  
"Are you awake?"  
  
That most hated voice caused a fresh bout of uneasiness in Tsuzuki. Anything with Muraki was never good.  
  
He glared at the pale man, trying to convey every ounce of hate he held. Muraki merely smiled at him.  
  
It was then that Tsuzuki noticed that he was not restrained in any way. Confusion now warred with anger and worry. Muraki didn't seem inclined to speak anytime soon; he was busy fiddling with a machine. So Tsuzuki took this time to recap his situation.  
  
He had had that freaky dream about Muraki (which now looked to be true), then Watari had come home, and then the light...  
  
Wait, where was Watari?  
  
Tsuzuki scanned the room quickly. It was surprisingly well-lit, unlike his dream's foreboding, but no sign of the blonde Shinigami was to be seen.  
  
Confusion was pushed out again by anger. He glared at Muraki once more.  
  
"Where is Watari?"  
  
The doctor looked up at him from the papers he had been looking at.  
  
"Ahh, yes, your blonde friend. Well, he's in a different room. Quite an interesting history he has, don't you think?"  
  
Tsuzuki snarled at him, trying to fight the feeling that something was very wrong. "What history?? Watari doesn't remember any of it! So it never happened, as far as I'm concerned!"  
  
A smirk was his response, and the uneasy feeling grew. Muraki merely smoothed back his hair. "Well, why don't you see for yourself?" He held out the papers he was holding. Tsuzuki stared at them balefully. This unnerved him greatly. Muraki was making no attempt to capture/molest/otherwise harrass him. He was being treated civilly, as if he were a business associate. It made Tsuzuki more suspicious.  
  
He cautiously took the papers, all the while watching Muraki. He then looked down and nearly died again.  
  
A twelve-year-old Watari stared at him from the paper, in grainy color. The solemn look on the boy's face was totally at odds with the genki scientist. He scanned over the page, growing more agitated.  
  
It was a detailed scientific account, written by no other than Muraki Tatsuhara, the father of the man standing across from him. Tsuzuki looked up from the papers, horrified.  
  
"You brainwashed him??"  
  
"No, not me. My father. Too bad dying caused it to be cancelled out."  
  
Tsuzuki glared at Muraki. "Well, that's good, Watari doesn't need brainwashing! I'm glad you can't control him anymore!"  
  
Muraki shook his head, amusement written over his features. "I told you, not me. My father. Besides, he is still very much under control."  
  
"What?? What do you-" Tsuzuki's angry yell was cut off by a powerful blow to his back. He keeled over and hit the ground, air going straight out of is lungs. He gasped painfully, but managed to flip himself over and see...  
  
...Watari?  
  
The blonde stood still, staring at him with blank eyes. He seemed oblivious to the fact that he had just hurt his best friend. Realization dawned on Tsuzuki in terrible clarity. He looked at Muraki, horrified.  
  
"You..." He gasped out.  
  
Muraki smirked. "I just said it cancelled it out, not erased it. It was quite easy to reactivate the magical programming to place him under my full control."  
  
Tsuzuki stared at him, enraged. He had never hated someone, other than himself, with such intensity before. But the self-doubt that plagued Tsuzuki constantly made itself known.  
  
You fool, it whispered, You brought him into this.  
  
Tsuzuki shook his head. This was no time to go into a depression! That was how Muraki had gotten him before. He had to return Watari to normal, then get out of here.  
  
But... the sneaky voice inside his head whispered poison. it took him dying last time to get rid of it. How do you think you'll do it now?  
  
I'll find a way! Tsuzuki thought angrily. I'll bring him back to normal!  
  
Just you try. It hissed at him. It's your fault he's in this mess in the first place, and besides, you're too ruined for him anyway...  
  
Tsuzuki shook off the voice and stood up, backing away from Watari. The scientist followed, golden-brown eyes blank and unresponsive. Tsuzuki had never really seen Watari in battle; he had no idea what the scientist was capable of. He may be older, and more powerful, but trying to stop someone without hurting them, while they were out for your blood, was always difficult.  
  
Muraki laughed. "See, Tsuzuki-san? Doesn't he make the perfect doll? He's just like porcelain. Pretty pale features and all." The doctor approached Watari, and the blonde halted. Tsuzuki watched in fascinated horror as Muraki lifted one long pale finger to trail down Watari's face  
  
"So pretty. No wonder my father thought him the perfect doll, ne, Tsuzuki- san? Such a beautiful face. But..." Muraki's eyes slid coyly to his. "You know that, don't you?"  
  
Despite the gravity of the situation, Tsuzuki blushed and sputtered.  
  
"Wh-what are you going on about, Muraki?"  
  
The doctor tilted his head, smiling. "So you deny it. How interesting. Is it because I am here? Or...because you are afraid?"  
  
Tsuzuki glared at the man, vainly fighting the blush that rose on his cheeks. "Afraid of what?"  
  
A dangerous gleam entered the man's eyes, his mechanic one seeming to glow evilly. "Afraid of what would happen to Watari, should you allow yourself to get too close to him."  
  
Visions flashed through his head unwantedly; blood and petals and darkness, always the darkness. Fighting off the rising horror and depression, Tsuzuki stumbled backwards weakly.  
  
"I...I don't..."  
  
But the memories were too much, as always. He felt himself sink into the familiar depression, losing touch with the outside world. The last sight he saw was that of Muraki grinning evilly, and Watari's blank eyes watching him.  
  
Then he descended into the darkness that was his personal prison.  
  
~Tsuzuku~  
  
AN: woo, go long chappie-ness. Last chapter and epilogue will be out soon! hard to believe I'm almost done with a fic o.o;; Not that's really long (it won't even break two digits in chapter numbers) but hey, this will be the first one I'll ever finish. Woo. ^^ Of course, feedback is appreciated, and thanks again to Lorraine for the inspiration finish this fic. 


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